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pills. September 14, 2010

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there is a whole bottle.i honestly want to eat the whole bottle now.

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a time. April 9, 2009

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fuck you j.k. seriously.

an open letter to mr big. March 8, 2009

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I hope as you become older and wiser, you’ll discover what makes you truly content. that you’ll learn that your goals are defined only by yourself and not anyone else. That manly is not a dressing style or an adjective used to describe an attribute of cologne, but an attitude whereby a man in this world should aspire to be intelligent, mature, have resolve in times of difficulty, conviction in the face of opposition, the strength to be vulnerable, and to have some courage to be honest to the people he cares about.

I miss you on most days in spite of myself.

Happy 26th birthday.

paroxetine. March 7, 2009

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i’m scared. i read about this drug, and it worries me.

if it does not work, i’m screwed further. OMG. i prayed over these drugs that they may work in the way it was intended to.

It. February 17, 2009

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this is so obviously it.

i’m heartbroken obviously, what’s new. i msed you to say, WTF was the last part all about? why the hell are you so full of yourself and the reply came back:

huh? what did i say?

i was not sure whether to laugh or cry.

and then my 5 stress points rushed in and overwhelmed me, as they do when i’m upset. and i don’t know what to do.i’m not okay.in the moment i’m not okay, i think its okay to die.

wtp (what’s the point?) January 28, 2009

Posted by author in emo nemo, shit hits the fan.
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at war with yourself, its time that you won.

– the frames

i hate you.

how could i be so entirely disrespected and shoved aside when you are all fine.perhaps its my fault for thinking i could fix you.

do i really mean NOTHING TO YOU?

sigh i need to run away.

if words could change things. December 15, 2008

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i would say,

stop all this and just be mine,

let us not let anyone else or anything come between us again.

i’ll be everything i can to you,

i’ll love you for who you are and not who you want to be,

because i already do.

Protected: leaving. December 15, 2008

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friends. November 30, 2008

Posted by author in deep thoughts, emo nemo.
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i am divided about them.

i am still friends with many people, but i trust less of them now. we should always be very very careful about who we open ourselves up to, for good reason.it is good to be open and not overly suspicious about people, but it is also paramount to choose carefully what you should share with some people.

he said derisively, i’ll be afraid the next time you fall in love because you can’t deal with loss.my mother would also agree that, if you can’t handle the possibility of it ending, you should not be getting yourself in love.

and then i recoiled in inwardly at this person who has lived his whole life within boundaries and playing it safe.

love teaches you the courage to be vulnerable.it makes you less selfish. and its a feeling that leaves you feeling like all the time in the world is not enough. it is life defining and changing, even if its not reciprocated.

Protected: twinkling ship lights November 20, 2008

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